Will instantly un follow anyone posting “thinspiration”, simple as that.
Is there such a thing as… for an individual to be too “free”? to live on whim and fancy, and luxuriate in their heart’s desires? Is there any good reason for romantic notions of self-sacrifice, and of… living quietly, taking only what is needed? Why am I phrasing in loaded questions instead of stating plainly what is on my mind? Why do we turn to others for answers to questions that our heart’s have long ago worked out? Why waste energy conducting complicated ballet’s of tragic confusion? an endless procession of able-bodied men, crippled by the look in the eyes of the men staring back at them in the bathroom. fraction-ed reflections, heads cocked to the side, unable to face the side not favoured in flavour. to refuse to see ourselves in others, and vice versa. vices verses one another, comparisons among soulless objects that reach redemption through idol inspired alteration, deformation for the sake of the nation, indivisible, under their own flaking finger nail, pinned there for oh so very long, as they pine for another time.
so quick to call an age golden,
who are we to decide?
the direction of the future’s histories down or/side-cast eyes…
i just want to share everything now and not care if what’s said is not fully meant or understood or whatever other mumbling, rambling, hysteria tries to take the place of one heart’s song. to fret on about the validity of a statement doesn’t serve my current goal of further developing my voice, and communication skills. if we can conquer our fears, we can come to address the things which are actually holding us back, and move on past the figments of the imagination, the evolved forms the monsters lurking beyond the edge of childhood’s colourful, comfortable, car-shaped bed. be still, my mind. be fully aware of that which passes you by -‘sides time.
it might be time
just
for me to practice what i preach
You just finished watching
Whip It
yea. and it made me really sad for how very bad I am at rollerblading. is rollerskating some how less difficult because there are… more wheels? the other day going down a hill, i couldn’t stop. falling, even still. i have to pee so bad, but this took precedent. i lost my ipod, so the two can no longer.. co-exist. so embarrassed for every single thing I’ve done. mostly. i am embarrassing. like parents on vacation when you are doing puberty and there are good looking people everywhere and oh my god, pretend to be here alone, act non-nonchalant, develop an alias!! that word should not have taken so long to figure out how to spell, it was the name of a tv show with jennifer garner in it.. how can that actresses name be taking up space in my brain, but not the spelling of the word? ho lei fuuuuuccck. mostly. go to bed… ok ok ok
the invention of an archetype
the negative connotations of the words precious, and cute
(not the movie.)
I really don’t like when people act stupid like they don’t know what’s going on, but it’s a whole other kind of unpleasant to find yourself doing just that. but then i think, “well, maybe I really don’t know.” oooh bother..
it’s nice to know that there is nothing more you can do.
i am the biggest idiot that ever there was.
i can rest now, having put this “out there”.
the sheer and utter absurdity of it all.
if I get bored trying to read back my writing, that means it’s no good, hey? blarg. i miss believing i was special. on with it all… or off? one or the other.
